I need jokes !?

oi say jokes but there always rubbish i want some that will make people laugh can u help xx

I need jokes !?-Myspace pictures

Nude after the wedding.

The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished. "Oh, oh,

aaaahhh," he exclaims, "My God you are so beautiful, let me take your

picture. Puzzled she asks, "My picture?" He answers, "Yes my dear, so I

can carry your beauty next to my heart forever". She smiles and he takes

her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower.

He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, "Why do you wear a

robe? We are married now." At that the man opens his robe and she

exclaims, "oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture". He beams and asks why

and she answers, "So I can get it enlarged!"

I need jokes !?

-(Myspace images myspace.com)

Title: I have a Microsoft waiter

Patron: Waiter!

Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem?

Patron: There's a fly in my soup!

Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.

Patron: No, it's still there.

Waiter: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.

Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.

Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?

Patron: A SOUP bowl!

Waiter: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?

Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with the fly in my soup?!

Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?

Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!

Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?

Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day?

Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.

Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?

Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.

Patron: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup, and the check. I'm running late now.

[Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check]

Waiter: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.

Patron: This is potato soup.

Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.

Patron: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.

[The waiter leaves.]

Patron: Waiter! There's a gnat in my soup!

The check:

Soup of the Day . . . . . . . . . . $5.00

Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day. . $2.50

Access to support . . . . . . . . . $1.00

Hope u like this joke.

Sit back and have a good laugh..
every time you masturbate chuck Norris punches a Mexican baby in the face