Can anyone tell me jokes?i dint smile 4 2 days...?

Some jokes

Can anyone tell me jokes?i dint smile 4 2 days...?-Myspace pictures

1

Fresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.

Instead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."

Willing to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.

"How long will this take?" she asks.

"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.

The wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"

"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"

He lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..

2

Man driving down road.

Woman driving up same road

They pass each other

Woman yells out her window, "PIG!"

Man yells out his window, "*********!"

Man rounds next curve

Crashes into a huge pig in middle of road.

Thought For The Day : If only men would listen.

3

The mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple's

house. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her

daughter-in-law standing naked by the door.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the

daughter-in-law

answered.

"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.

"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.

"Love dress? But you're naked!"

"My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it

makes me

happy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home

from

work any minute."

The mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the

way

home she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed,

showered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally

her

husband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"This is my love dress" she replied.

"Needs ironing." he said.

HEHE%26gt;%26gt;HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING

Can anyone tell me jokes?i dint smile 4 2 days...?

-(Myspace images myspace.com)

i can tell you a lot of jokes but may i suggest you try Yahooligans.com or cartooncritters.com.

i know they are orginally for children but they have a couple of good jokes that will hopefully make you crack up!! :D
what do ya call a black pilot? A black pilot u rasist *****
smileeeeeeeeeeeeeee

laughhhhhhhhhhhh

smileeeeeeeeeee

laughhhhhhhhh
go on this sites if u wont more ask me
not one of the funniest jokes but hope it at least puts a smile on your dial...

A koala is sitting in a tree smoking a joint when a little

lizard walks past and looks up and says to the koala

"Hey! what are you doing?"

The koala says "Smoking a joint, come up and have some."

So the little lizard climbs up and sits next to the koala

and they have a few joints. After a while the little lizard says his mouth is 'dry' and is going to get a drink from the river.

The little lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and falls into the river. A crocodile sees this and swims over to the little lizard and helps him to the side, then asks the little lizard, "What's the matter with you?"

The little lizard explains to the crocodile that he was

sitting smoking a joint with the koala in the tree, got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink. The crocodile says he has to check this out and walks into the rain forest, finds the tree where the koala is

sitting finishing a joint, and he looks up and says "Hey

you!" The koala looks down and says

"Faaaaarrrrk dude.......how much water did you drink?!!"
Myspace thats a joke. Everyone is just on there to spy at other peoples. Maybe see if miss tiffanie got fat since high school. It's addicting too, once you start you're hooked.